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My pet rock is convinced the end is near. It's been acting a bit sedimental lately.
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I told my friend the world is ending tomorrow. He said, 'Great, I don't have to pay my bills!
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Why did the scarecrow say the end is near? Because he was outstanding in his field!
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My refrigerator started a rebellion – it believes the end is near because it's constantly defrosting!
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Why did the bread go to therapy? It kneaded someone to talk to about the end being near!
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I told my friend the apocalypse is coming. He replied, 'Well, that's a bit of an 'end' exaggeration!
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