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So, I was at a coffee shop, and there was this "suicidal emo" sitting in the corner, sipping on their dark coffee. I thought, "Is that coffee black, or is it just as moody as its drinker?
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You ever notice how "suicidal emos" have mastered the art of the dramatic sigh? I tried it once, and people just thought I had something stuck in my throat.
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I was behind a "suicidal emo" in line at the grocery store, and their shopping basket had only black items. I thought, "Wow, even their groceries are mourning the blandness of life.
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I asked a "suicidal emo" for directions once, and they pointed me towards the nearest cemetery. I guess that's their way of saying, "Life's a journey, and we're all headed in the same direction.
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I saw a "suicidal emo" at the mall the other day. Man, their fashion choices are so bold. I mean, I can't even commit to wearing all black on laundry day!
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Have you ever tried playing charades with a "suicidal emo"? It's impossible! Everything looks like a deep and meaningful metaphor. I guessed "existential crisis" for a simple game of Pictionary.
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Suicidal emos" are like human mood rings. You can tell their emotional state by the intensity of their eyeliner. It's like, "Oh, that's a heavy Tuesday.
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I met a "suicidal emo" at a comedy club once. I told them, "Don't worry; tonight's show won't be too dark." They said, "Perfect, just how I like it – like my soul!
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You ever notice how "suicidal emos" always have the most elaborate and artistic doodles in their notebooks? Meanwhile, I struggle to draw a decent stick figure.
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