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I told my friend about the apple thing, and now he's taking it to the extreme. He's started eating apples while doing yoga, juggling apples, even sleeping on a bed of apples. I think he's trying to become the healthiest circus act in town.
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An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but no one warned me about the side effects. Now I'm stuck with this weird compulsion to give nutrition advice to strangers. "You there! Have you had your apple today? It's a life-changer!
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They say an apple a day keeps the doctor away, but have you ever tried saying that to your dentist? I did, and now he's giving me the "an apple a day keeps your molars at bay" lecture. I should have kept my fruit secrets to myself.
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I tried the whole "an apple a day" thing, but now my doctor just greets me with, "Hey, it's the apple enthusiast! Still avoiding me, huh?" I didn't realize I was signing up for a fruity commitment.
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An apple a day is supposed to keep the doctor away, but no one mentioned anything about dentists. I bit into one of those super crunchy apples, and suddenly, I'm in the waiting room of a dental clinic with a broken tooth. Thanks, Granny Smith, for the unexpected dental adventure!
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I tried switching to apple-flavored everything to meet my daily quota. Apple toothpaste, apple-scented deodorant, even apple-flavored coffee. Now, every time I enter a room, people look around for the hidden orchard.
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I'm convinced that the real reason an apple a day keeps the doctor away is because the doctor is too busy trying to figure out why we're all suddenly obsessed with apples. "Another one? What's with these people and their fruity rebellion?
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I tried an apple-only diet for a week. Now, not only do I dread the doctor's office, but I've also developed an irrational fear of fruit baskets. I mean, who knew apples could be so emotionally traumatic?
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I overheard someone in the grocery store telling their kid, "Remember, an apple a day keeps the doctor away." The kid looked at them and said, "Can I have a second opinion? Maybe from a candy bar?" Smart kid, I tell ya!
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