5 Jokes For Mortician

Double Meaning Jokes

Updated on: Nov 14 2024

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Graveyard Shift Woes

Dealing with unexpected visitors
The worst part of the graveyard shift? Dealing with those ghost hunters who mistake your flashlight for a paranormal encounter. "No, sir, that's just my keys jingling, not a poltergeist.

Life of a Mortician

Balancing the somber and the absurd
I once tried speed dating, but it turns out morticians and speed don't really go hand in hand. Unless you're talking about rigor mortis.

Casket Conundrums

Meeting budget constraints
Trying to sell an expensive casket is like trying to upsell someone on the deluxe funeral package. "Would you like the gold-plated urn with that? It's on special this week.

Late-Night Embalming Chronicles

Dealing with sleep-deprived clients
I had a client once who was so sleep-deprived that during the eulogy, they started clapping for their own life. Talk about a posthumous applause.

Funeral Fashion Police

Choosing the right outfit for eternity
You know you've been a mortician too long when you start judging people in regular life based on their burial attire choices. "Oh, he's definitely a flip-flops-in-the-casket kind of guy.

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