10 Jokes For Kermit

Observational Jokes

Updated on: Jul 18 2025

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Kermit's voice is so soothing, it could calm a storm. I wish I had him on speed dial for those moments when my GPS gets confused, and I need directions. "Turn left at the next intersection... and remember, it's not easy being lost.
I envy Kermit's ability to stay cool under pressure. If I were surrounded by a bunch of talking animals, I'd be constantly asking, "Am I on a hidden camera show? Is Ashton Kutcher about to jump out and tell me I'm being punked?
Kermit's puppeteer must have biceps of steel. I can barely lift my groceries without complaining about it for a week. Meanwhile, this guy's out there, controlling a frog, making it ride bikes and sing. I can't even make my pet goldfish do tricks.
You ever notice how Kermit the Frog is always trying to keep things together, managing a bunch of Muppets? I can barely handle my group chat with three friends. Kermit's like the ultimate project manager of the puppet world.
Kermit is the only frog I know who's constantly surrounded by chaos but manages to keep that cool, collected demeanor. If I were him, I'd be more like, "Miss Piggy, Fozzie, please, can we have just one day without someone breaking into song?
You ever realize that Kermit's life is a bit like a reality show? "Keeping Up with the Muppets." I can already imagine the tagline: "It's not easy being green, but it's even harder being the voice of reason in a world full of felt and foam.
Kermit is always flipping that collar of his. I guess it's his way of saying, "I'm in control here, folks!" If I tried that move, people would just assume I have an itchy neck. Kermit's the only one who can make a fashion statement with a felt collar.
Kermit's relationship with Miss Piggy is a masterclass in diplomacy. He's basically the United Nations of the Muppet world, mediating between a diva pig and a bunch of eccentric characters. I can barely navigate the drama at a family barbecue.
You ever notice how Kermit is the only frog who can pull off an open relationship? Miss Piggy has eyes for him, but he's got a whole gang of Muppets to manage. That's some next-level polyamorous puppetry.
I bet when Kermit has a bad day, he just sits by a pond, looks at his reflection, and thinks, "Well, at least I'm not a tadpole anymore." It's the puppet version of a midlife crisis.

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