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Did you hear about the cheese who tried drugs? It got caught up in the 'brie'f addiction!
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Why was the belt arrested? It was holding up pants with illegal substances!
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Why did the scarecrow get promoted? Because he was outstanding in his field – unlike drugs!
I Tried to Get High on Yoga, But It Was a Stretch
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So, I decided to take the don't do drugs advice seriously. I thought, why not get high on life? Tried yoga. Turns out, the only thing high was my level of confusion during downward dog. Who knew stretching could be so stressful?
Turning Down Drugs Like a Pro...crastinator
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Don't do drugs, they say. I take it seriously; I've become a pro at turning them down. Well, not drugs per se, but those vitamin gummies my doctor keeps recommending. Sorry doc, I'm a professional procrastinator.
Dodging Drugs Like a Matador at a Pharmacy
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I live by the motto don't do drugs, but pharmacies are like bullfighting arenas. You enter, and suddenly, you're dancing around aisles trying to dodge medications like a matador avoiding a charging bull. Olé, headache medication, not today!
Life's Too Short to Follow All the Advice
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Don't do drugs, they say. Well, life's too short to follow all the advice. I'm out here living on the edge, eating expired yogurt and mixing patterns like it's a fashion revolution. I call it the rebellious rebellion.
Avoiding Drugs Like a Ninja Avoids Responsibilities
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I'm committed to don't do drugs life. I dodge drugs like a ninja dodges responsibilities. Sneaking around them, doing backflips over peer pressure, and disappearing when someone pulls out a suspicious-looking pill bottle. Stealth mode: engaged.
I'm on a 'Don't Do Drugs' Diet
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They say, don't do drugs, but I took it a step further. I'm on a 'don't do drugs' diet. I've lost 10 pounds of stress and gained a newfound appreciation for herbal tea. My life's a detox, and my body's a temple—well, a temple with WiFi and a snack stash.
Opting for the Natural High... On Espresso
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They say, don't do drugs, but have you tried surviving without caffeine? I'm all about that natural high, so now I'm just here chugging espressos like they're liquid motivation. If my heart could talk, it would probably be screaming, Slow down, buddy!
The Only Thing I'm Addicted to is Online Shopping
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They say, don't do drugs, so I decided to channel my addictive tendencies elsewhere. Now, the only thing I’m hooked on is online shopping. My mailman knows me better than my neighbors do.
Just Say No to Life's Pop Quiz
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You know, they say don't do drugs. I tried following that advice, but then life throws these unexpected pop quizzes at you. I’m here thinking, “I just wanted a multiple-choice question, not a multiple-life-choices kind of situation!”
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