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Joke Types
The Hungry Parishioner
Trying to focus on the homily while being distracted by thoughts of lunch.
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Ash Wednesday homilies are the only time I consider fasting a punishment for my taste buds.
The Forgetful Catholic
Forgetting you have ashes on your forehead and confusing people.
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I was so forgetful after the Ash Wednesday service that I went to a job interview with "dirt" on my forehead. They probably thought I was applying for a gardening position.
The Coffee-Deprived Devotee
Trying to stay awake during the homily after giving up coffee for Lent.
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Gave up caffeine for Lent. Ash Wednesday homilies feel longer than a Netflix series marathon without the option to binge-watch.
The Sneezing Sufferer
Trying not to sneeze during the blessing of the ashes.
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I had to hold in a sneeze during the whole service. By the end, I wasn't sure if I needed ashes or a tissue.
The Overzealous Penitent
Overthinking sins and wondering if God's forgiveness includes accidental ice cream theft.
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I'm so repentant on Ash Wednesday that I even confessed the time I accidentally cut in line at the grocery store. Father looked at me like, "Is this a confession or a stand-up routine?
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