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Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Twice. I tried counting to ten once and got winded.
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You know you're in for a wild ride when Chuck Norris walks into a room and the laws of physics start nervously checking themselves.
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Chuck Norris can unscramble an egg. I tried that in the kitchen and ended up with a very confused omelette.
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Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door. I tried it at the mall, and now I'm banned for life.
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They say light travels faster than sound. That's because Chuck Norris can catch up to sound and ask it politely to move aside.
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Chuck Norris's email is just one character: a roundhouse kick emoji. I sent him a message once; my inbox is still recovering.
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Chuck Norris can divide by zero. I asked him to help me with my math homework, and now I'm tutoring him in algebra.
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Chuck Norris doesn't do push-ups. He pushes the Earth down. I tried it once, and now my neighbors hate me.
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Chuck Norris can find the needle in the haystack. I tried it and found a sweater, a lost earring, and the meaning of life. Still no needle, though.
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