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Divorce lawyers are like the referees of relationships. They come in, blow the whistle, and start throwing penalties for emotional misconduct. "Five yards for not taking out the trash, sir!
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Divorce is like a roller coaster. You start off excited, thinking it'll be a thrilling ride, but halfway through, you're just screaming, "I want off! Someone, please, stop the emotional roller coaster!
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Divorce is like a subscription service you forgot to cancel. It keeps billing you emotionally, and every month, you're like, "Why am I still paying for this drama?
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Divorce parties are a thing now. Can you imagine? Celebrating the end of a marriage is like throwing a graduation party for failing a class. "Congratulations, you're officially single! Now let's eat cake and contemplate our life choices.
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Going through a divorce is like a game of Monopoly. At first, you're excited to start, but halfway through, you're just praying someone lands on your "Get Out of Marriage Free" card.
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Going through a divorce is a bit like playing chess. Each move is strategic, and you're constantly calculating the emotional cost of sacrificing that pawn or that favorite DVD collection.
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Dating after a divorce is like learning to ride a bike again. You're a bit wobbly at first, and there's a chance you might fall, but eventually, you'll get the hang of it – hopefully without any training wheels this time.
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You ever notice that going through a divorce is a bit like trying to unsubscribe from a spam email? No matter how hard you try, those emotional pop-ups just keep showing up when you least expect it.
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Divorce court is like a reality show, but with more paperwork and fewer roses. Instead of a final rose, you get a final decree, and trust me, it's not as romantic.
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