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I made a spectacle of myself at the optician's office. At least now I have stylish frames!
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I asked my optician if I needed bifocals. He said, 'Well, you're getting there.
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I went to the optician with a broken lens. He said, 'Looks like you've lost focus.
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Why did the optician bring a ladder to work? To help people see things from a different perspective!
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Opticians always make you feel like you're failing an eye exam. 'Is it better with lens one, or lens two?' I'm just hoping there's a 'none of the above' option!
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Opticians are basically eye fashion consultants. 'These frames say sophisticated, but those say, 'I might be able to read minds.' I just want frames that say, 'I can find my keys.'
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I asked my optician if I could get glasses that make me look smarter. He handed me a pair and said, 'These won't help, but people might assume you know something about quadratic equations.'
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Opticians are like the referees of vision. They make sure your eyes play fair, but deep down, they know your left eye has been sneaking peeks at other prescriptions.
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I went to the optician the other day, and he asked me to read the smallest line I could see. I said, 'How about the one where I don't have to pay for these glasses?'
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Opticians must have a secret society where they gather to discuss our eyes. I imagine them saying, 'Did you see Mrs. Johnson's left eye last Tuesday? It was all over the place!'
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Opticians are the only people who can make you doubt your own eyes. 'Are you sure you can't see that line?' I'm thinking, 'I can't even see the truth on my ex's Instagram, doc.'
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I bet opticians have a great sense of humor. After all, they've seen it all – the good, the bad, and the 'I thought that was a wall, not a door' moments.
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Opticians are the only people who can ask you if you can see clearly while they flip lenses in front of your eyes. I feel like I'm auditioning for a role in 'The Matrix,' but with less cool sunglasses.
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