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I used to think marriage was a word. Then I realized it's a sentence... a life sentence!
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I used to believe in love at first sight. Then I got divorced. Now I believe in taking a second look!
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Marriage is like a roller coaster. It has its ups and downs, and sometimes it makes you want to puke.
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My friend said his marriage was like a deck of cards. At the start, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you're looking for a club and a spade!
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Marriage is when a man and woman become one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one!
Divorce rates are so high, I heard they're considering adding a 'sponsored by IKEA' sticker to marriage certificates!
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You know, it's like they're saying, Hey, if this doesn't work out, at least you'll have some stylish furniture to divide equally!
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Divorce rates are skyrocketing. It's gotten to the point where wedding planners are considering a new business model – instead of 'Happily Ever After,' it's 'Let's Not Get Our Hopes Up!'
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They say the divorce rates are high due to financial disagreements. I guess 'for richer or for poorer' is just too much of a financial gamble these days!
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I read somewhere that the divorce rates are so high that they're planning to start a loyalty program: 'Get divorced five times, and the sixth one's on us!'
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The divorce rates are so high that I heard divorce lawyers are having a 'Bring Your Ex to Work Day' just to keep up with the demand!
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Divorce rates are so high that the new pickup line is, 'Are you a marriage? Because statistically, you probably won't work out!'
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They say the divorce rates are so high because of irreconcilable differences. I think the main difference is between what you think marriage is gonna be like and what it actually turns out to be!
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Divorce rates are through the roof. Nowadays, couples break up over the silliest things. I mean, I know someone who filed for divorce because their partner couldn't decide what to watch on Netflix!
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I heard divorce rates are so high that they're planning to introduce a Divorce Fair. You know, instead of a bridal shower, you get a 'split party' with half of your friends!
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