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I recently had cataract surgery, and I have to say, the scariest part was when they asked me to count backward from 10. I got to 7 and thought, "Wait, is this a surgery or a magic trick?
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They say after cataract surgery, colors appear more vivid. I went in expecting a Marvel movie experience, but all I got was my living room looking like it discovered Instagram filters.
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The hardest part about cataract surgery? Trying to explain to your grandkids why you can see better now, but you still can't figure out how to set the clock on the microwave.
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You know you're getting old when you start looking forward to cataract surgery like it's a trip to the spa. "Ah, yes, darling, I booked the deluxe package – extra vision and a complimentary eye mask!
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Cataract surgery is like the eye version of a home makeover show. "Congratulations, your eyes have just been upgraded from 480p to 4K! Coming soon – 'Eye Improvement,' hosted by Dr. See-Change.
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Cataract surgery is like getting VIP treatment for your eyes. I half-expected a red carpet to be rolled out as I entered the operating room. Maybe even a tiny orchestra playing soothing tunes like, "I Can See Clearly Now.
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I told my friends about my cataract surgery, and suddenly everyone had an opinion. "You should have gone with LASIK." Oh, sure, because turning my eyes into a PowerPoint presentation slide is exactly what I wanted.
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Cataract surgery is like upgrading to a new software version for your eyes. I'm just waiting for the pop-up notification: "Your eye system is due for an update. Click 'OK' to improve your vision and receive 20/20 patches.
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They handed me a pamphlet before cataract surgery with a list of potential side effects. It was like reading a menu of the worst possible things that could happen. "Will I have blurry vision with a side of regret or maybe a dash of existential crisis?
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