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Joke Types
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What's a mafia member's favorite workout? Extortion – it's the best way to flex those negotiation muscles!
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What's a mafia boss's favorite game? Monopoly – it's all about taking over the board!
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What do you call a mafia member who tells jokes? A wiseguy – he always has a punchline ready!
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What's a mafia accountant's favorite type of music? Money laundering – it's always a hit!
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What's a mafia boss's favorite movie genre? Whodunnits – he loves a good mystery!
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What do you call a mafia boss who can't see well? The Don with glasses – he's 'short-sighted' about his enemies!
Mafia Yelp Reviews
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Did you know the mafia has its own version of Yelp? It's called 'Cosa Nostra Reviews.' Five stars for discretion, two stars for punctuality – apparently, they have a hard time making hits on time. I ordered a 'special delivery' three days ago, and still no sign of my package.
Mafia Grocery Shopping
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I went to the store with a mafia guy once. It was weird. Every time he picked up a tomato, he whispered, You talkin' to me? I'm just here for the vegetables, man, not the existential crisis in the produce aisle.
Mafia Family Feuds
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Mafia family feuds are intense. It's like the real-life version of 'Game of Thrones,' but with fewer dragons and more cannolis. Instead of a Iron Throne, they fight over who gets the comfy chair at the head of the dinner table.
Mafia Gym Etiquette
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I started going to the mafia gym. It's the only place where if someone asks, Do you even lift? they're not just questioning your strength; they're checking if you can properly dispose of a body. My bicep curls are now more about 'burials' than 'muscles.
Mafia Family Reunions
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You ever been to a mafia family reunion? It's the only place where 'kiss the ring' isn't just a saying – it's an awkward family tradition. Forget 'Guess Who?' It's more like 'Guess Who's the Underboss?
Mafia Therapy Sessions
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I heard the mafia is now offering therapy sessions. Yeah, apparently, even mobsters need to talk about their feelings. So, Tony, how does it make you feel when someone doesn't respect your territory? And don't say 'sleepin' with the fishes.'
Mafia Tech Support
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I called the mafia for tech support once. I asked, My computer's not working, can you help? They said, Sure, send it to sleep with the fishes. My laptop has never been more obedient.
Mafia Dating Advice
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A friend asked me for dating advice, so I turned to my mafia buddy. He said, If she disrespects you, send her a message. I was expecting flowers, but he meant more of a 'horse head in the bed' kinda message. Maybe I'll just stick to chocolates.
Mafia Job Interviews
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I applied for a job with the mafia once. The interviewer asked me, How do you handle pressure? I said, Well, I once folded laundry while watching 'The Godfather' marathon. Does that count?
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