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The Midnight Snack Bandit
Sneaking around the kitchen after hours
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I've become so good at sneaking into the kitchen at night that I'm considering joining a heist movie. Ocean's Eleven? More like Midnight Munchies One.
The Noise Ordinance Violator
Living life with the volume turned up
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I got a warning for violating the noise ordinance. I didn't even know that was a thing. I thought my neighbors were just fans cheering for my awesome playlist.
The Speed Demon Driver
Dealing with speed limits and traffic rules
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Speed limits are like suggestions to me. I don't always follow suggestions – just ask my diet plan.
The J-Walking Expert
Navigating the world on foot without following pedestrian rules
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I was stopped by a police officer for jaywalking. I told him I was just practicing for the "dodge the traffic" Olympics.
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