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Estate agents are like Cupid, but instead of matchmaking hearts, they're matching people with the perfect walk-in closet. Because who needs love when you have storage space, right?
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I asked my estate agent for a "fixer-upper." They showed me a house that was so broken, even the termites were holding their noses.
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I met with an estate agent the other day who described a studio apartment as "cozy." Cozy? It's so small, even the mice are carpooling!
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You know you're dealing with a fancy real estate agent when their business card is thicker than the walls of the houses they're trying to sell.
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Estate agents are like the GPS of the housing market. They confidently guide you through the twists and turns, and just when you think you've arrived, they tell you to make a U-turn.
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I went to an open house, and the estate agent proudly proclaimed, "It has a breathtaking view!" Turns out, the only breathtaking view was the neighbor's laundry.
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Ever notice how estate agents always use words like "quaint" and "charming" to describe a place? Translation: "Get ready for a shockingly small bathroom.
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Have you ever noticed that estate agents use the term "open concept" for a room without doors? Because apparently, privacy is so last season.
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Estate agents have a unique talent for making a one-bedroom apartment sound like a mansion. "It's not small; it's just a cozy palace with fewer rooms.
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