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What did the mummy say to the embalmer? 'You really wrapped things up nicely!
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Why did the ghost become an embalmer? He wanted a job that wouldn't be too 'spirit'-ual!
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What's an embalmer's favorite movie genre? Suspense – it really keeps you on the edge of your casket!
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Why did the zombie become an embalmer? He wanted a career with more 'dead'-ication!
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Why did the embalmer bring a ladder to work? He wanted to reach new 'heights' in his profession!
Embalmers Anonymous
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I think embalmers have their own support group. It's called Embalmers Anonymous. They stand up and say, Hi, I'm Dave, and I've been preserving bodies for 15 years. Meanwhile, the rest of us are like, Dave, we just use sunscreen, man.
Embalming: The Ultimate Job Security
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They say robots are taking our jobs, but I bet embalmers are safe. I mean, do you really want a robot preserving you for the afterlife? Error 404: Soul not found. Please contact customer support.
Embalming vs. Pickling
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Have you ever thought about the similarities between embalming and pickling? It's like we're turning into human cucumbers. If aliens find us, they'll think Earth is just a giant jar of intergalactic pickles.
Embalming Olympics
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I heard they're introducing embalming as an Olympic sport. Gold medal for the best-preserved corpse! Finally, athletes can compete in something that truly lasts a lifetime.
DIY Embalming Kits
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I saw they're selling DIY embalming kits online. Yeah, because nothing says fun weekend project like turning your garage into a makeshift morgue. Just imagine the neighborhood gossip: Oh, the Smiths are at it again, embalming in the garage!
Embalming, the Original Anti-Aging
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People spend so much on anti-aging creams, but have you considered embalming fluid? You'll look 25 forever. Sure, you won't be able to move or appreciate it, but hey, at least you'll be wrinkle-free.
Embalming: The Real Fountain of Youth
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They talk about finding the fountain of youth, but I think embalming is the real deal. Sure, it's a one-way ticket, but at least you'll have a fabulous-looking corpse. Priorities, people!
The Embalming Experience
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You know, they call it embalming, like they're preserving you for a museum or something. I don't want to be preserved; I want to decompose in peace! I don't need to be the mummy at someone's future Halloween party.
Embalm and Chill?
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I heard there's a new dating trend - embalm and chill. Yeah, forget Netflix, it's all about formaldehyde and romance. Nothing says love like, Hey, let's spend eternity together... literally!
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