17 Jokes For Drink Too Much

Puns

Updated on: Jun 22 2025

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What did one beer say to the other? You're hoppy to see me!
Why did the grape stop drinking? It couldn't handle its wine!
I asked my beer for some space. Now it's in a can.
I only drink on days that start with 'T.' Tuesday and Thursday!
Why did the beer go to school? It wanted to be a little brrrrrighter!
What's a vampire's favorite drink? A Bloody Mary!
What's a skeleton's least favorite room in the house? The living room, because it's full of spirits!

Booze & Clues

You ever drink so much that your night becomes a mystery? I wake up in the morning and find clues everywhere, like a missing phone, random selfies with strangers, and receipts from a taco truck I don't remember visiting. It's like being in my own tipsy detective story, trying to piece together the shenanigans of Drunk Sherlock.

Drunk Text Chronicles

Ever sent a text when you’re three drinks past coherent? I become a literary genius, composing essays of emotion and wit that Shakespeare would envy. Then I wake up to a reply that reads, Are you sure you meant to send this to me? It's like my phone develops a drinking problem too.

Barroom Olympics

Drinking too much turns a regular night out into an Olympic event. Suddenly, I’m partaking in games I never trained for, like the 100-meter sprint to the bathroom or the gymnastics routine of trying to put my key in the door lock. Forget gold medals, I'm just hoping for a participation certificate at this point.

Conversations on Repeat

Drinking too much sometimes feels like hitting the repeat button on conversations. You end up having deep philosophical discussions about life, love, and the universe with your friend, only to realize the next day you've discussed the same topics at the same bar last week. It's like Groundhog Day with cocktails.

Karaoke Catastrophes

Have you ever been so drunk that your go-to karaoke song becomes a public service announcement? I’m belting out tunes like 'Don’t Stop Believin'' or 'Livin' on a Prayer' like I’m teaching life lessons, but in reality, I’m just a glorified tone-deaf choir conductor.

The Morning After Memoirs

Drinking too much gives you a library of morning-after memoirs. You wake up with a mental slideshow of blurry pictures and fragmented memories, trying to decipher what happened last night. It’s like piecing together a jigsaw puzzle where half the pieces are missing, and the rest don’t seem to fit anywhere.

The Liquid Confidence Effect

One thing about drinking too much is it gives you the confidence of a superhero. I become so convinced of my abilities that suddenly I’m a world-class dancer in a crowded bar. But in reality, I’m more like a baby giraffe on roller skates – wobbly, awkward, and prone to collisions.

Drunk Food Logic

You know you’ve had one too many when your culinary choices turn into a questionable masterpiece. I’m in the kitchen at 3 am, crafting dishes like the 'Microwaved Burrito Sandwich' or the 'Cereal Fusion Surprise' – where anything and everything goes in a bowl. It’s the Picasso of late-night snacks.

Sobriety's Time Machine

Ever noticed how alcohol turns time into a magical blur? One minute you’re at the bar thinking it’s 10 pm, and the next moment, it’s suddenly sunrise, and you've time-traveled through a night that feels both too long and too short. It’s the tipsy TARDIS effect.

The Mixology Experiment

Drinking too much turns every gathering into an impromptu mixology class. Suddenly, I'm a genius chemist, mixing various alcohols, fruit juices, and questionable ingredients, convinced I’m inventing the next big cocktail. Spoiler alert: It’s usually just a headache in a glass.

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