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Funeral Director
Dealing with quirky requests from families
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Had a guy who wanted to be cremated in his favorite recliner. I thought, "Well, that's one way to take comfort to the afterlife. Just hope there's no assembly required on the other side.
Crematorium Technician
Handling the technical challenges of cremation
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Ever had a cremation interrupted by a fire alarm? Nothing says "emergency exit" like a flaming urn. I guess it's one way to make a grand exit.
Environmentalist
Balancing environmental concerns with cremation
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I asked the crematorium if they could use recycled paper for the urn. They said, "Sure, it's the thought that counts." Well, I hope it's recycled thoughts because I don't want any old love letters in there.
Ghost
Dealing with the cremation aftermath
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I asked the guy who scattered my ashes to do it in a cool place, like a concert or a beach. He chose a garden gnome convention. Now I'm the most sarcastic gnome ghost ever.
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