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Self-checkout machines at the grocery store are the real-life version of a pop quiz. "Please place the item in the bagging area." Who cares if it's in the bagging area or not? I just want to buy my cereal without feeling like I'm failing a tech test.
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You know when you get a new gadget and it comes with a manual thicker than a novel? Who cares to read that? I'll figure it out by randomly pressing buttons and hoping for the best. It's the adult version of trial and error.
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You know what's fascinating? Those 'Do Not Remove' tags on mattresses. Who cares? Is there a secret mattress police force that's going to bust through the door if I cut one off? Maybe it's all a conspiracy to make us feel like we're breaking the law just by wanting to get comfortable.
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When you're on hold with customer service and the automated voice says, "Your call is important to us." Who cares about my call's importance when I've been serenaded by elevator music for 20 minutes? I feel like I'm starring in my own hold music concert.
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Why do alarm clocks come with a 'snooze' button? Who cares about those extra nine minutes of sleep? It's not like it's the most restful part of the morning anyway. It's just an extended version of the dream where you're almost late for work.
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Weather forecasts are a hoot. They predict a 30% chance of rain. Who cares about the odds? If there's even a hint of clouds, I'm bringing an umbrella big enough for a family picnic.
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Have you ever noticed how a "shortcut" on GPS turns into the scenic route? Who cares about the extra sights and sounds? I just want to get to my destination without feeling like I'm on a detour through the countryside.
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Have you ever been in a conversation where someone starts a story with, "Long story short..." and it's still the longest story you've ever heard? Who cares about the length, we're committed now! Might as well pull up a chair and grab some snacks for this "short" saga.
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The 'Open Other End' directions on a box of aluminum foil or plastic wrap. Who cares which end I open? I'll unravel it like a magic trick until I find the right side. It's a secret quest every time I want to wrap up leftovers.
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