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Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field... but who cares, right?
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Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts... but who cares, it's not like they can stomach a fight!
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Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one... but who cares, it's just a game!
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Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing. Who cares, it's just a tomato!
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Why don't we ever tell secrets on a farm? Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears. Who cares, vegetables can't gossip!
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What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta. Who cares, it's still edible!
Who Cares About Salad Dressing?
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You ever notice how salad dressings have more variety than a high school drama? Ranch, Italian, balsamic vinaigrette... I mean, who cares? We're just trying to mask the taste of leaves!
Who Cares About Hair Products?
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Why are there a million hair products for different hair types? I mean, who cares if my hair looks like I just wrestled a tornado? As long as I can leave the house without scaring children, I'm good!
Who Cares About Fashion Trends?
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Fashion trends change faster than my commitment to a diet. I mean, who cares if bell-bottoms are making a comeback? I'm still trying to figure out how to properly wear a scarf without looking like a confused magician!
Who Cares About Reality TV Drama?
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Reality TV is like a bad soap opera. They're fighting over who stole whose protein shake or who forgot to wash the dishes. I'm just sitting here like, Who cares? Can we switch to a channel with less drama and more puppies, please?
Who Cares About Celebrity Pets?
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So, celebrities keep flaunting their pets online. I mean, who cares if your Chihuahua has its own Instagram account? I barely have time to manage my own social life, let alone my pet's social media presence!
Who Cares About Organic Foods?
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People go crazy for organic foods. But who cares if my apple was hugged by a tree or not? As long as it doesn't taste like cardboard, I'm calling it a win!
Who Cares About Traffic Lights?
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You know what's more confusing than my love life? Traffic lights. Red means stop, green means go, and yellow means... panic? Who cares! I'm just trying to get to work without turning into a permanent fixture on the highway!
Who Cares About DIY Fails?
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I attempted a DIY project once, emphasis on attempted. Who cares if my table looks like it's trying to escape its own legs? At least I've got a conversation starter for my next party!
Who Cares About Gym Selfies?
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Gym selfies flood social media. But seriously, who cares if you can lift a truck? I'm just trying to find the motivation to walk up a flight of stairs without feeling like I need a nap afterward!
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