17 Jokes For Unkempt

Puns

Updated on: Aug 05 2024

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I told my unkempt friend to tidy up his diet. Now he eats cereal straight from the box – one step closer to cleanliness!
Why did the unkempt broom break up with the vacuum? It said, 'I need space to sweep around!
I used to date an unkempt calendar, but we broke up. It couldn't handle commitment – always changing its dates!
I asked the unkempt mirror for fashion advice. It said, 'Reflect on your choices, but don't expect me to look any better!
What did the unkempt sandwich say during the picnic? 'Lettuce romaine unkempt and spread joy!
I accidentally stepped on an unkempt rake. It really knows how to leave an impression – on my foot!
Why did the unkempt chef become a gardener? He wanted to let his parsley grow freely!

The Tale of Uncle Bob's Beard

You ever see someone so unkempt, you're not sure if they're auditioning for a lumberjack role or just lost their razor?

Barber's Nightmare

Walked into a barbershop, saw a dude so unkempt, the barber asked him, You want a haircut or should we just call a landscaper?

The Great Outdoors

I went camping last weekend and looked so unkempt, a bear approached me thinking I was a distant relative.

Morning Hair, Don't Care!

I woke up this morning looking so unkempt; even my bedhead was considering filing for separation!

The Mystery of the Couch Potato

My buddy's apartment is so unkempt; I once lost a sandwich and found it three weeks later. Still debating if I should eat it.

Beach Body Unready

I tried to go to the beach, but with this unkempt look, people thought I was a new species of seaweed.

Food for Thought

Went to a buffet, looked so unkempt, they tried charging me extra because they thought I was smuggling in a second person.

Lost in the Wild

Saw a guy so unkempt, I thought he was a missing contestant from Survivor who just gave up halfway through.

Laundromat Chronicles

I did laundry last night, but when I came out, I looked so unkempt, even the washing machine gave me a dirty look.

Office Antics

At work, I looked so unkempt; HR sent me a memo thinking I was a new office plant they forgot to water.

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