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I tried to organize my desk the other day, but the papers on it were having a rebellion. They formed a union called the Unkempt Association for the Preservation of Chaos. Needless to say, I lost that battle.
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I'm convinced that there's a parallel universe where everything is perfectly organized, and my unkempt alter ego is there living his best life. I just hope he's doing a good job representing me.
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You ever notice that the more unkempt your appearance, the more likely people are to ask if you're an artist? Apparently, messy hair and paint-stained clothes are the new business casual.
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I recently realized that my bedhead has reached a level of sophistication. It's not just messy; it's a carefully curated collection of tangles that says, "I didn't choose the unkempt life; the unkempt life chose me.
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Cleaning my room is a battle between my desire for a tidy space and my commitment to maintaining an ecosystem for dust bunnies. I like to call it organized chaos, or as my mom calls it, "Seriously, clean your room.
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I tried explaining to someone that my unkempt appearance is a fashion statement. They looked at me and said, "Honey, it looks like your fashion statement is 'I've given up,' and I respect the honesty.
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You ever look in the mirror in the morning and think, "Wow, I really nailed the unkempt look today"? It's like I have a personal stylist called Chaos.
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I've decided that my hairstyle is a form of self-expression. It's not messy; it's avant-garde unkempt. I call it the "I woke up like this, and I'm owning it" chic.
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My closet is a mysterious place where my clothes engage in a daily battle for dominance. The winner gets to be worn, and the losers get to stay in the unkempt abyss at the back.
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