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I recently went on a nature hike with a buddy who loves to smoke weed. He insisted it would make the hike more "enlightening." Let me tell you, halfway up the trail, he became convinced that a squirrel was plotting against us. Spent a good 20 minutes negotiating a peace treaty with this squirrel! I'm pretty sure if you ask the squirrel, it's now the ruler of its own tiny, sovereign nation up on that hill.
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You know, they say smoking weed can make you more creative. Well, I tried it, and let me tell you, I became the Picasso of procrastination. Suddenly, I had all these brilliant ideas for things I should be doing, but instead, I rearranged my snack cabinet alphabetically. I even color-coded my socks! Turns out, my creativity peaked in the realm of avoiding responsibilities.
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Ever notice how when people are high, suddenly, the most profound thoughts come to mind? Like, I was sitting with my friend, and out of nowhere, he goes, "What if oranges are just pre-squeezed juice?" I mean, I never thought of that! But then again, at that moment, I also believed I could speak fluent dolphin, so there's that.
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So, I heard about this new smart fridge that tells you when you're out of food. Brilliant, right? Well, not so much when you're stoned. Imagine standing there, getting a notification from your fridge that says, "You're out of milk," and you're like, "Whoa, my fridge is talking to me!" Next thing you know, you're having a heart-to-heart with your appliances, contemplating the meaning of life with your toaster.
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