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Joke Types
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Why did the presidential candidate hire a tailor? To ensure they had a 'suit'-able image!
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Why did the candidate bring a ladder to the debate? Because they wanted to raise the bar!
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Why did the presidential candidate always carry a map? To find their way to the oval office!
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Why did the candidate visit the farm? To round up some votes from the 'sheep'le!
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What do you call a candidate who's always running late? A procrastinator-in-chief!
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Did you hear about the candidate who campaigned in a zoo? They were trying to win the 'elephant' vote!
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Why did the politician always carry a suitcase? In case they had to pack up their campaign promises!
Presidential Slogans
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Every president needs a catchy slogan, right? Mine would be: Vote for me, and I promise to make Mondays optional. Who's with me?!
State of the Union Snacks
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You ever notice during the State of the Union address, everyone's all serious? I'd change that. I'd hand out popcorn and announce, Ladies and gentlemen, prepare for the most entertaining political show on Earth!
Campaign Promises
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Politicians always make these big promises during their campaigns. If I ran for president, my main promise would be free Wi-Fi everywhere. I mean, let's focus on the real issues, people—Instagram shouldn't buffer.
The Oval Office Makeover
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If elected president, I'd redecorate the Oval Office. You know, add a little flair. Maybe a disco ball and a karaoke machine—I call it the Executive Entertainment Center.
Presidential Playlist
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I've already planned my presidential playlist. First song? I Will Survive by Gloria Gaynor. Because let's be honest, being president is like navigating a never-ending disco inferno.
Presidential Fitness Program
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They always talk about a president's health. I'd introduce a new fitness program: Executive Exercise. It involves a lot of running—running away from responsibilities. It's a bipartisan workout plan!
The Presidential Race
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You know, I was thinking about running for president. But then I realized, the only race I've been winning lately is the one to the fridge during commercial breaks.
Debates and Desserts
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They say presidential debates are crucial. If I were in one, I'd make it interesting. Picture this: instead of discussing policies, we'd have a bake-off. Let's see who can whip up the best economic pie!
Presidential Perks
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Imagine the perks of being president! I'd use Air Force One for grocery shopping. Forget about road rage; I'd be up in the clouds deciding between organic or regular bananas.
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