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The Internet Connection
Buffering is its cardio.
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My internet is so late; it's convinced the information superhighway is a slow Sunday drive.
The Alarm Clock
Waking you up is harder than rocket science.
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The only thing my alarm clock wakes up on time is my neighbors.
The GPS
"Turn left" means "make a U-turn and question your life choices."
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GPS, the only device that can make you late and lost simultaneously – a true multitasker.
The Delivery Guy
"Fast delivery" is just a suggestion.
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The only express delivery this guy knows is expressing how much he loves taking his time.
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