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You ever notice how the classic Valentine's Day movie involves someone standing outside someone else's window, holding a boombox or a sign? In real life, that's just called a restraining order.
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Ever notice how Valentine's Day chocolates are in those heart-shaped boxes? Like, nothing says love more than "I bought you sweets, but only the ones that fit into this predefined shape.
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Valentine's Day is the one day when cooking dinner together becomes a romantic activity. The rest of the year, it's more like a battle for control of the kitchen and the last piece of garlic bread.
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You know, Valentine's Day is like the Super Bowl for card companies. They're sitting there, waiting all year, just hoping you'll draft their heartfelt message instead of going for the Hail Mary of writing your own.
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Valentine's Day is the only time when being a great gift wrapper can compensate for a last-minute, panic-purchased present. It's like, "Sure, the gift's a toaster, but check out this ribbon!
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Valentine's Day is the only time where heart-shaped balloons make perfect sense. Any other day, and people would be like, "Why are you giving me an organ-shaped balloon? Is this a medical emergency?
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The pressure on Valentine's Day is real. It's the one day a year when your relationship status isn't just a personal matter—it's a public service announcement.
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Valentine's Day cards are like the tiny, rectangular ambassadors of love. You read them, and you're like, "Wow, I didn't know I felt this strongly about you until Hallmark told me.
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Valentine's Day is the one day a year when flowers become more expensive than gold. It's like, "Here, I got you a bouquet of love and a second mortgage on our house.
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