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You ever notice how the wise men brought gold, frankincense, and myrrh as gifts? I bet there was an awkward moment when they were exchanging presents. "Oh, you got me gold? How original. I got you frankincense. It's the thought that counts, right?" Christmas, the first season of regifting.
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Mary must've been the first mom to experience the struggle of finding a suitable background for a baby photo. "Joseph, hold up the shepherd's crook and smile. I want this to look heavenly." Meanwhile, the shepherds are in the background trying to wrangle the sheep for an impromptu photoshoot.
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The nativity scene is like the ancient version of a celebrity birth announcement. Imagine the headlines: "Virgin Birth Shocks Bethlehem – Three Wise Men Travel from Afar to Confirm." It was the first tabloid-worthy event in history.
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You know you're an adult when you look at a nativity scene, and instead of thinking about the miracle of birth, you wonder about the carpenter who made that stable. I bet Joseph was giving him Yelp reviews like, "Five stars for craftsmanship, but seriously, dude, we needed more heating in there.
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Nativity scenes are like the Christmas version of Where's Waldo. You're scanning the tiny figures, trying to find baby Jesus. And every year, someone in the family insists on rearranging the characters like, "Let's see if anyone notices if we swap the wise men and the sheep this time.
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Nativity scenes are the OG Christmas dioramas. It's like they invented the concept of miniatures before it was cool. Now, people are all into building model train sets and tiny villages. The nativity scene was the pioneer, and those wise men were the first hipsters – they brought gifts before it was mainstream.
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Ever notice that the nativity scene never has an "Out of Order" sign? I mean, if I were a shepherd, I'd probably be tempted to put one up after spending a night with a bunch of angels singing non-stop. "Sorry, heavenly choir, we're closed for maintenance. Find another field.
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Nativity scenes are like the original baby pictures. Forget Instagram, Mary and Joseph were the first parents to share a snapshot of their newborn with the world. And those shepherds were the first to comment, "Cute baby, but why's he in a manger? Get that kid a crib!
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Nativity scenes are like the first GPS system. The star was their navigation guide. I can imagine the wise men arguing about directions: "Melchior, are you sure this is the right star?" "Gaspar, we're following a star in the sky; there's no room for detours!
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You ever notice how nativity scenes are like the original "Who's Who" of Bethlehem? I mean, everyone's there – Mary, Joseph, three wise guys, a couple of sheep... it's like the first-century version of a red carpet event. I can almost hear the sheep saying, "Baa, darling, you won't believe who's wearing wool this season!
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