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Tourist on a Texas Ranch
Navigating the unexpected challenges of being a city slicker on a longhorn ranch
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I tried riding a longhorn, thinking it would be like a cowboy in the movies. It was more like trying to stay on a furry, four-legged roller coaster.
Rodeo Announcer
Trying to make longhorns sound more exciting than they really are
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The rodeo announcer told me he's working on a new longhorn catchphrase: "This bull is udderly fantastic!
Longhorn Therapist
Helping longhorns cope with the stress of being longhorns
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Longhorns have trust issues. One asked me, "Do these horns make me look intimidating?" I said, "No, it's your moo-demeanor that's the real kicker!
Longhorn Whisperer
Dealing with stubborn longhorns who don't appreciate being whispered to
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Longhorn whispering tip: If a longhorn gives you attitude, just tell it a corny joke. They hate it, but it breaks the ice.
Vegetarian at a Texas BBQ
Feeling out of place at a barbecue surrounded by longhorns and grill enthusiasts
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At the Texas BBQ, they asked if I wanted the longhorn medium or rare. I said, "Can I have it in a veggie wrap instead? No? Well, then I'll just have a grass-fed water, please.
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