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Joke Types
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Why did the considerate bicycle always apologize? It was two-tired of causing any trouble!
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I told my plants a joke. They didn't laugh, but they were all in-fern-tained!
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I tried to be a baker because I kneaded dough. Turns out, I wasn't 'bred' for it!
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I told my dog he was adopted. Now he won't stop looking for his 'real' paw-rents!
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Why did the kind-hearted math book offer emotional support? It had too many problems!
The Humane Handbook
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You know, I recently read this handbook on being more humane. It said, Treat others the way you want to be treated. So, now I'm just waiting for my neighbors to start delivering pizza to my door, because that's exactly how I want to be treated.
Humane Social Media
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I'm making an effort to be more humane on social media. Instead of unfollowing people, I just mute them. It's like giving them a social media invisibility cloak. They'll never know, and I can peacefully scroll through my feed without their cat memes invading my peace.
Humane Weather Complaints
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I tried to be more humane when complaining about the weather. Now, instead of saying it's too hot or too cold, I just tell people, It's environmentally diverse outside today. I'm basically the weather's public relations manager.
Humane Gym Etiquette
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I've started going to the gym to work on my physique and be more humane. But it turns out, the most inhumane thing you can do at the gym is accidentally make eye contact with someone while they're mid-burpee. It's like catching them in their natural, sweaty habitat.
Humane Technology
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I'm trying to be more humane in my use of technology. So, instead of ghosting people, I've upgraded to zombieing them. You know, slowly fading away but still lurking in the background. It's the undead version of being considerate.
Humane Dating Tactics
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I've adopted a more humane approach to dating. Instead of playing hard to get, I play easy to ignore. It's a foolproof plan: if they don't text back, I can tell myself they're just being considerate of my time.
Humane Party Exits
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I've learned to exit parties in a more humane way. Instead of sneaking out, I make a grand announcement: I'm leaving now, but my spirit will linger on in the awkward dance moves and questionable karaoke choices you'll remember forever. It's my gift to humanity.
Humane Traffic Jams
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I've decided to approach traffic jams in a more humane way. Now, when someone cuts me off, I don't honk. I simply roll down my window and politely ask if they'd like my GPS coordinates so they can navigate their way back to driving school.
Humane Dilemmas
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I tried to be more humane, you know, like helping animals and all that. So, I adopted a pet fish. But now I can't sleep at night, thinking about the ethical dilemma of flushing the toilet. I mean, how would you like it if someone flushed while you were swimming in your own living room?
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