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Why did the person without friends start a garden? Because they wanted to grow some companionship!
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Why did the person without friends bring a ladder to the bar? They heard it was a high-spirited place!
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What do you call someone with no friends in the art world? A lone sketcher!
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Why did the person without friends become a chef? They wanted to be an expert in 'soul' food!
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What do you call someone with no friends in the tech world? A lone coder!
Loneliness is my cardio
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I overheard someone say loneliness is their cardio. Well, I guess that explains why I'm in the shape of a potato. I've been doing marathons of solitude!
Selfie with imaginary friends
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I tried taking a selfie with my imaginary friends the other day. Nailed it! The trick is to have friends so exclusive, they don't even show up in pictures.
Friendship levels unlocked
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You know you've reached a new level of friendship when your phone auto-corrects 'alone' to 'a cone.' Even your phone is trying to soften the blow of your social life.
People without friends
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You know, I heard people without friends have the best social distancing skills. I mean, who needs six feet apart when you're already 60 Facebook friends apart?
Anti-social media
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I'm so anti-social that even my social media accounts have privacy settings set to 'Hide from Myself.' It's like my online presence is on witness protection from my own loneliness.
Introvert Olympics
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I've been training for the Introvert Olympics. The first event is the 100-meter dash to the mailbox and back. Spoiler alert: I won gold, silver, and bronze.
Friend request rejected
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I sent a friend request to a guy with no friends on Facebook. Got rejected. I didn't know you could be socially rejected in the digital world too. Now I have to face the shame of being friend-zoned by someone with zero friends.
Lonely hearts club
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I tried joining the lonely hearts club, but it turns out it's just a group chat with no one talking. It's like being in a silent disco, but without the disco or anyone else.
My social circle is a dot
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People say their social circle is small. Mine's not even a circle; it's a dot. If you asked me to draw it, it would be a lonely dot, probably contemplating its life choices.
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