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Why did Oscar Wilde never become a weatherman? Because he refused to predict anything without a touch of dramatic irony!
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Why did Oscar Wilde never get into politics? He couldn't stand the idea of being dull enough to win votes!
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What's Oscar Wilde's favorite dance move? The quickstep – it's impossible to keep up with his wit!
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Oscar Wilde's fitness routine? Lifting the weight of his own brilliance every day!
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Oscar Wilde tried gardening but gave up. He said, 'I couldn't compete with my plants – they were too rooted in their own humor.
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I told a friend I could imitate Oscar Wilde perfectly. He said, 'Prove it.' So I walked into a room and said, 'I'm leaving before I get here.
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