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Why did Chuck Norris become a chef? To discover the origin of spice – the secret ingredient in his roundhouse kicks!
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Why did Chuck Norris become a mathematician? To solve the equation: Chuck Norris + Math = The Origin of Everything!
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Why did Chuck Norris become a detective? To solve the mystery of who can stand up to his roundhouse kicks!
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Why did Chuck Norris become a gardener? To understand the origin of plants saying 'ouch' when he walks by!
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Why did Chuck Norris become a musician? To discover the origin of the perfect roundhouse kick beat!
The Chuck Norris Origin Story
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You know, they say Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. That's right, folks, he's so tough that even his emotions are scared of him.
Chuck Norris's Love Life
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Chuck Norris doesn't date; he just stares at a woman until she decides she wants to have his babies. He once looked at his wife for five minutes straight, and now they have twins.
Chuck Norris's Birth Certificate
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I found Chuck Norris's birth certificate the other day. It doesn't have a birthdate; it just says, The day Chuck Norris allowed it to happen. I guess Chuck decided when he was ready to grace the world with his presence.
Chuck Norris's Teenage Rebellion
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Chuck Norris's teenage rebellion was refusing to be a ninja. He said, Ninjas are too mainstream; I'll be a Chuck-nja. That's when he invented a new martial art form – Chuck Fu.
Chuck Norris's School Days
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Chuck Norris's school report card didn't have grades; it had warnings. The teacher wrote, Chuck tried to roundhouse kick math into submission. Well, who needs math when you're Chuck Norris?
Chuck Norris's Retirement Plans
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Chuck Norris doesn't retire; he just takes extended coffee breaks. His retirement plan is staring at the sun until it gives up and goes away. Sunscreen? That's for mere mortals.
Chuck Norris's First Words
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Chuck Norris's first words were, Mom, I don't need a nightlight; darkness needs a Chuck-light. And that's when they realized they didn't have an ordinary baby; they had a Chuckling.
Chuck Norris's Childhood Pranks
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You think you were a troublemaker as a kid? Chuck Norris once grounded his parents. Yeah, they couldn't leave the house until they finished their veggies. That's some serious parenting skills.
Chuck Norris's Legacy
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They say, when Chuck Norris dies, Death will have a near Chuck Norris experience. And instead of a tombstone, he'll have a rock with a sign that says, Don't disturb; Chuck's just taking a power nap.
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