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My husband said he got me a gift that would change my life for my birthday. It was a gym membership. Rude, but he's not wrong.
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I asked my husband for a surprise for my birthday. He said, 'You're not getting one if you know about it.' Well, surprise – he's sleeping on the couch tonight!
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My wife asked me what I wanted for my birthday. I told her, 'An apology would be a good start.
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I told my husband I wanted something shiny and capable of going from 0 to 100 in seconds for my birthday. So he bought me a bathroom scale.
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I asked my husband if he remembered my birthday. He said, 'How could I forget something I never knew?
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For my birthday, my husband gave me a mood ring. When I'm in a good mood, it turns green. When I'm in a bad mood, it leaves a red mark on his forehead.
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