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You know, I thought collusion was when your socks secretly conspire against you to disappear in the laundry. Democrats and Russia colluding? My laundry has more coordination than that.
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If Democrats and Russia are trying to collude, I hope they at least have a shared calendar. "Meeting with Putin - 3 PM, followed by 'Conspiracy and Chill' - 4 PM." It's all about that political work-life balance.
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If Democrats and Russia are colluding, I hope they have a better code name than my Wi-Fi password. "Operation SiberianSnowflake123" just doesn't strike fear into the hearts of the enemy.
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Democrats and Russia colluding – sounds like a plot twist in a sitcom. "Coming this fall: 'Spy vs. Spy vs. Political Dysfunction.' Spoiler alert: Nobody wins, and everyone just ends up arguing over who ate the last slice of pizza.
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I tried colluding with my diet once, but the chocolate cake had a stronger influence on me. If only I had the dedication of politicians trying to coordinate with foreign powers. "Day 1: Collusion, Day 2: Cheat day.
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I tried colluding with my alarm clock for a later wake-up time, but it seems even inanimate objects won't compromise with me. Maybe politicians should learn a thing or two about negotiation from my persistent snooze button.
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Democrats and Russia colluding – it's like watching a spy thriller, only with more bureaucratic paperwork. "Mission Impossible: Filling Out the Correct Forms." I bet even James Bond would need a coffee break midway through this political espionage paperwork.
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I tried colluding with my GPS once, and it got me lost in my own neighborhood. If Democrats can't even coordinate with Russia, maybe they should start with Google Maps. "Take a left at the misinformation, then a right at the scandal.
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Democrats and Russia colluding – it's like trying to mix oil and water. I can't even get my salad dressing to stay together, and they're attempting international collaborations. Maybe they should hire my grandma; she can make anything stick.
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