bestTrending Topics
Joke Types
0
0
Why did the pastor go to therapy? He needed someone to help him find inner psalm!
0
0
Why did the church choir go to the beach? They wanted to hit the high C's!
0
0
Why did the church keyboardist get a promotion? Because he had good organ-ization!
0
0
Why do church folks make great comedians? They have a sermon for every situation!
0
0
Did you hear about the church that started a gardening club? They have a strong congregation!
0
0
Why did the pastor start a bakery? He wanted to make some divine pastries!
Heavenly Fashion Police
0
0
You haven't experienced fashion critique until you've attended church with the fashion police squad. Sister Ruth can spot a misplaced sequin from a mile away, and Brother John is ready to issue a citation for anyone daring to wear jeans. It's like Project Divine Runway, and I'm just trying not to get voted off the spiritual catwalk.
Sermon Slumber Party
0
0
Church folks love to greet you with a warm smile and a firm handshake, but when the sermon starts, it's like they've entered a spiritual slumber party. The pews become makeshift beds, and the pastor becomes the Sandman. I once saw Sister Martha snoring so loud; I thought it was the church organ hitting a new low note.
Hallelujah Hiccups
0
0
Have you ever tried to stifle a laugh during a church service? It's like playing a game of spiritual hide and seek. The preacher is delivering a sermon about salvation, and there I am in the back pew, trying to camouflage my chuckles with an overenthusiastic cough. I call it holy hiccups—the struggle is real.
Heavenly Potluck Politics
0
0
Attending a church potluck is like entering the Hunger Games of culinary diplomacy. There's an unspoken hierarchy of dishes. If you bring store-bought cookies, you're basically volunteering as tribute to the judgmental glares. I once saw a lady exchange her lasagna for a better spot in the heavenly seating arrangement—it was a potluck power move.
Divine Dunk Contest
0
0
Baptisms in church are like the divine dunk contests. The preacher becomes the MVP, and the congregation rates the candidates on style and technique. I'm just waiting for someone to pull off a triple somersault before hitting the holy water. It's baptismal acrobatics for the salvation gold.
Holy Chuckles
0
0
You know, I recently started attending church, and let me tell you, those church folks are the only people who can make a potluck dinner feel like a high-stakes culinary competition. I brought mac and cheese once, and Sister Mary gave me the side-eye like I just committed a sin. I didn't realize there was a divine standard for cheesy goodness.
Gospel Gossip
0
0
Church folks are the masters of gossip disguised as prayer requests. Dear Lord, we lift up Sister Jenkins and her mysterious pineapple allergy. We don't know where she got it, but you do, Lord. It's like a spiritual episode of CSI, and Sister Jenkins is the victim of a fruity conspiracy.
Prayerful Pictionary
0
0
I joined a church game night recently, and let me tell you, church folks take Pictionary to a whole new level. Instead of drawing simple words, they're sketching out complex biblical scenes like it's the divine edition. Trying to guess Daniel in the lion's den when all you see is a stick figure and a furry blob is a religious riddle I wasn't prepared for.
Pews and Peril
0
0
Church folks have a special talent for turning simple tasks into perilous missions. Trying to find your designated pew during a crowded service is like navigating a spiritual minefield. If you accidentally step on someone's invisible pew boundary, you risk a glare that could rival Medusa's stone-cold stare. It's pew warfare, and I'm just hoping for a ceasefire.
Choir Karaoke Showdown
0
0
I love the church choir, but they turn hymns into a full-blown karaoke showdown. It's like The Voice with a divine twist. Last Sunday, Sister Thompson hit a high note that had the angels questioning their career choices. I didn't know whether to clap or offer her a record deal.
Post a Comment