bestTrending Topics
Joke Types
0
0
You ever notice how church events always have the friendliest people? It's like they're in a competition to out-hug each other. You walk in, and suddenly you're in the middle of a Christian hug tornado. "Oh, you're new? Let me introduce you to everyone in the room with a warm embrace. We're like a human welcome committee!
0
0
Have you ever tried to discreetly check the time during a church event? It's like trying to defuse a bomb with a wristwatch. You sneak a peek, and suddenly the person next to you thinks you're having a divine revelation. "Amen, brother! Time flies when you're in the presence of the Lord!
0
0
Ever notice how the church bulletin board is like a spiritual Craigslist? "Lost: One sock during the youth group sleepover. Reward offered in heavenly blessings." It's where the community comes together to share their sacred stories and seek divine intervention for missing items.
0
0
Church bulletins are like the ancient scrolls of the congregation. You get one on Sunday, and it's like receiving the sacred text for the week. "Thou shalt attend the bake sale on Saturday, and verily, there shall be a sign-up sheet for coffee hour. Let the congregation say, 'Amen!'
0
0
Church events have the most intense handshake exchanges. It's not just a handshake; it's a spiritual connection. You grip hands, make eye contact, and suddenly you're locked in a handshake prayer circle. "May the power of the firm handshake guide you through the week, my friend. Amen!
0
0
Why do church events always have the most cryptic announcements? "Brothers and sisters, be prepared for a special surprise this Sunday. It's a mystery even to us, but trust in the Lord and your confusion shall turn to joy." I just hope it's not another surprise puppet show.
0
0
Church potlucks are like culinary Russian roulette. You're never quite sure if Sister Mary's casserole is a heavenly delight or if Brother Joe's mysterious green Jell-O salad is going to transport you to another dimension. "Is that pineapple or did someone accidentally drop their car keys in there?
0
0
Church parking lots are a battleground of politeness. It's like a passive-aggressive dance of who can let the other person go first. "No, after you." "No, after you." It's a spiritual game of vehicular chicken, and I'm just praying someone takes the lead.
0
0
The church choir is the only place where a wardrobe malfunction during a performance is considered a divine intervention. "Oh, Sister Sarah accidentally ripped her choir robe during 'Amazing Grace.' It's a sign, people! The spirit moves in mysterious ways!
0
0
Church announcements always include a plea for volunteers. "Brothers and sisters, we need someone to organize the annual bake sale. Don't make us resort to store-bought cookies; that's a sin we're not ready to commit!" Suddenly, you find yourself signing up for cookie duty, and you can't even bake toast.
Post a Comment