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Hey everyone! So, I got this note from my ghost writer - "black and white and red all over." Now, I know what you're thinking - that's the start of a terrible penguin joke. But no, it's that classic riddle: What's black and white and red all over? You know what I realized? It's a newspaper! Seriously, think about it. It's black and white and read all over. You get it? But then I thought, "Wait, do people even read newspapers anymore?" I mean, if I'm on the subway and I see someone reading a physical newspaper, I think they're either a time traveler or a hipster who's taken irony way too far.
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Alright, let's dive into this phrase - "black and white and red all over." I couldn't help but think about a panda playing paintball. Can you imagine that? A panda in a paintball arena, thinking it's a bamboo forest showdown? It's all having fun until someone shouts, "Hey, why's the panda covered in red?" And then it hits me, that panda didn't sign up for paintball; it's just trying out new camouflage, thinking, "I'll just blend in with my surroundings." Sorry, buddy, but red isn't part of the black-and-white dress code.
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Alright, so I'm pondering this whole "black and white and red all over" thing, and I can't help but feel for penguins. Imagine a penguin slipping on an ice cube and turning red from embarrassment. They're already wearing tuxedos 24/7, trying to look all fancy, and then, whoop! They take a slide down the iceberg. Poor guy just stands there, trying to play it cool like, "Yeah, I totally meant to do that." You know what would be worse? If other penguins started taking selfies with him in the background, captioned, "When you realize you're not the coolest penguin in town.
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Alright, so "black and white and red all over." It's like a sunburnt zebra, right? I mean, can you imagine a zebra hitting the beach without sunscreen? He'd come back looking like a barcode with a sunburn! Poor guy would be standing there like, "Yeah, I thought I'd try a tan, but all I got was this lousy sunburn, and now I'm a fashion disaster." And imagine other animals trying to console him. "Don't worry, Zeb, stripes are still in this season!" Sunscreen, folks, it's not just for humans anymore.
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