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How did the Zen student greet the master on a hot day? 'Namaste in the shade.
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What did the Zen Buddhist say when the hotdog vendor gave him the wrong change? 'Keep the change, there is no self.
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Why did the Zen master refuse novocaine at the dentist? Because he wanted to transcend dental medication.
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What did one Zen monk say to the other while passing by a hotdog stand? 'Make me one with everything.
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What did the meditating frog say? 'I'm trying to find my Zen, but I'm feeling a little jumpy.
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What did the meditating cat say when asked about the meaning of life? 'Purr-spective.
Zen and the Furious Keyboard Typing
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I thought I'd bring some zen to my workplace, so I got this keyboard with tranquil nature sounds. Now, every email I send sounds like a tropical rainforest, but my boss still thinks I'm typing angry manifestos.
Zen and the Lost TV Remote
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I tried to find my TV remote in a state of zen calmness. Turns out, being at peace with the universe doesn't help when you're stuck watching a home shopping channel for three hours straight.
Zen and the Art of Smartphone Maintenance
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You ever try to repair a cracked screen with a YouTube tutorial on zen meditation? Spoiler alert: it doesn't work. My phone's inner peace is shattered, just like its screen.
Zen and the Unbearable Lightness of Socks
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I bought these amazing socks with zen written on them. Turns out, they're so zen, they've mastered the art of disappearing in the laundry. Now I have a drawer full of single, enlightened socks.
Zen and the Art of Refrigerator Feng Shui
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I rearranged my fridge for maximum zen vibes. Now, every time I open it, a bunch of vegetables roll out, mocking me for my failed attempt at culinary enlightenment.
Zen and the War of the Thermostats
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Trying to maintain zen in a shared living space is like trying to agree on the thermostat setting. I'm sweating bullets in my quest for inner peace, while my roommate thinks we're living in an igloo.
Zen and the Epic Battle with Alarm Clocks
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My alarm clock has a zen mode, and it wakes me up with gentle nature sounds. Problem is, I'm so relaxed I end up dreaming about being on time instead of actually getting up. It's like inception but with more snooze buttons.
Zen and the Subtle Art of Not Understanding Directions
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My GPS has a zen mode. It says things like, You are one with the road. Translation: You missed the turn, genius. Now recalculating your journey to eternal frustration.
Zen and the Mindful Pet Goldfish
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I tried teaching my goldfish zen meditation. Now it just stares at me with that blank fish expression, probably thinking, I'm too busy swimming in circles to achieve nirvana, Karen.
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