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You ever feel like you're training for the Waste of Time Olympics? I mean, I've been putting in some serious hours. The other day, I spent a good half an hour looking for my keys. I finally found them in my hand. I thought I was being pranked by my own brain. And then, to make matters worse, I congratulated myself for finding them. "Well done, me! You really outdid yourself this time.
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Let's talk about time travel for a moment. I'm convinced I've mastered it. I can spend hours binge-watching a TV show, and it feels like time has just warped into another dimension. But the real paradox is when I realize it was a terrible show. I look back and think, "I just time-traveled to a dimension where bad TV is acceptable. What a waste of time-travel potential!
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I recently spent an entire afternoon curating the perfect playlist. I mean, it had to be flawless. I meticulously selected each song, ensuring the perfect balance of genres and vibes. And then, when I finally hit play, I realized I'd spent so much time creating the playlist that I was no longer in the mood for music. It was like I threw a party for one and forgot to invite myself.
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You know, they say practice makes perfect, and if that's the case, I'm a gold medalist in the Procrastination Olympics. I can procrastinate on anything. I've turned avoiding tasks into an art form. I even considered making a to-do list once, but then I thought, "Why waste time writing a list when I could be avoiding everything on it?
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