bestTrending Topics
Joke Types
0
0
Have you ever tried watching a movie with Tommy? The guy can't sit still! He's always pausing to explain some obscure reference or predict the plot twist like he's the Oracle from the Matrix. Tommy, I'm just here for the popcorn and the plot, not a cinematic thesis!
0
0
You ever lend something to Tommy? Just forget about it. I gave him a book last year, and I swear it's gone into the Bermuda Triangle of his apartment. Every time I ask, he's like, "Oh, right! I was just about to bring it back," as if my novel is on a world tour.
0
0
Tommy has this strange habit of always having a story that's "way better" than whatever you're talking about. You're sharing a funny anecdote, and he's there, interrupting with, "Oh, that reminds me of this time..." It's like he's in a constant battle to one-up everyone's experiences.
0
0
I've realized Tommy has this uncanny ability to always show up five minutes after you've finished cleaning your house. You're basking in the glory of a spotless living room, and then, boom! Tommy walks in with muddy shoes and a pizza, acting like he's the guest of honor.
0
0
Has anyone else noticed how Tommy always insists on being the "designated DJ" at parties? But let's be real, his playlist is just a random shuffle of '90s hits and questionable techno remixes. By midnight, we've gone from nostalgic sing-alongs to wondering if we're in an underground rave.
0
0
You know what's odd about Tommy? He's the only guy I know who can turn a simple game night into a full-blown competitive sport. Last time, we were playing Monopoly, and he starts negotiating property deals like he's on Wall Street. Dude, it's Baltic Avenue, not a multi-million-dollar real estate deal!
0
0
I've come to realize that Tommy's idea of "helping out" is just rearranging your stuff without asking. You leave the room for a minute, and boom! Your coffee table is now in the kitchen, and your remote control has taken a vacation to the bathroom counter.
0
0
Tommy loves giving advice about relationships, yet he's been single longer than my grandma's been knitting scarves. Every time he starts with, "You know what you should do..." I'm tempted to reply, "Find a date for Friday night?
0
0
I've figured out Tommy's secret. He's a self-proclaimed "foodie," but let's be honest, his culinary skills peaked at making toast. I mean, the guy tried to impress us with a "gourmet" meal last week, and it was just spaghetti with ketchup. Bravo, Gordon Ramsay would be proud!
0
0
You know, I've noticed something about Tommy. Every time he says he's on a "diet," he starts by telling you how he's just going to "cut back a little." Two days later, he's posting pictures of kale smoothies on social media like he's auditioning for a health magazine cover.
Post a Comment