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You know, the other day I walked into a public restroom, and there was a sign that caught my eye. It said, "Please think twice before flushing." I mean, come on! Do they think we're in there having deep philosophical debates with ourselves? Like, "To flush or not to flush, that is the question." I'm just trying to handle my business, not write a thesis on toilet etiquette! And then it hit me, maybe they're onto something. Maybe we should all "think twice" before making major life decisions. Imagine if we had warning signs everywhere – "Think twice before ordering that extra-large pizza" or "Think twice before hitting 'send' on that risky text." Life would be a lot more interesting, and probably a lot less regrettable.
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You ever notice that when you pull up to a drive-thru, they always hit you with the "Can I take your order?" like it's the final round of a game show? And they expect you to be ready with your order, like you've been studying the menu for weeks. But no, I need a moment to think! Maybe they should have a disclaimer before they start, like "Think twice before ordering the spicy chicken sandwich, it might ruin your day tomorrow." I'll tell you, if I had a nickel for every time I regretted my drive-thru choices, I'd be able to afford a personal chef who could make those decisions for me.
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Relationships are like playing chess, but you're blindfolded, and the chess pieces are emotions. You gotta "think twice" before you make a move, or you might end up in checkmate – or worse, in the doghouse. And don't even get me started on the silent treatment. You'll be sitting there, pondering your life choices, wondering if leaving the toilet seat up was really worth it. I think we need relationship warning labels. "Think twice before leaving dirty dishes in the sink," or "Think twice before suggesting a romantic comedy for movie night." It's all about calculated risks, my friends.
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Have you ever sent a text message and immediately regretted it? Like, as soon as you hit that "send" button, you wish you could hit an "undo" button for life. It's like, "Think twice before texting your ex" should be a pop-up notification on every phone. And don't even get me started on autocorrect. It's like my phone is playing a constant game of "Guess what I meant." I swear, sometimes I look at my texts and think, "Did I just accidentally declare war with that emoji?" We need a tech support hotline for our social lives.
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