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It's amazing how on Facebook, everyone's life seems like a highlight reel. Meanwhile, I'm over here trying to figure out how to make yesterday's leftovers look Instagram-worthy.
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It's funny how on Facebook, people become professional chefs at dinner time but forget how to spell basic words. One minute it's a gourmet meal, the next it's like they've never seen the word "Wednesday" before.
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I love how Facebook memories can remind you of that embarrassing phase you thought you left behind. Thanks, Facebook, for reminding me of my questionable fashion choices and even more questionable opinions from a decade ago.
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You ever notice how the most productive thing you can do on Facebook is to tell people you're taking a break from Facebook? It's like announcing you're going to the gym by sitting on the couch.
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You know you're getting old when you remember when Facebook was just a place to update your status with "is" at the beginning. Now, it's like a full-time job managing your online persona!
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Isn't it ironic how we scroll through Facebook, feeling more connected than ever, but end up feeling more isolated? It's like attending a party where everyone's talking, but no one's really listening.
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Ever scrolled through Facebook and felt like you're watching a soap opera, but with people you actually know? Drama, plot twists, and unexpected reunions, all before your morning coffee.
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You know you've spent too much time on Facebook when you start treating your life like a series of status updates. "Just had coffee" or "Feeling existential at 3 AM" – because if it's not on Facebook, did it even happen?
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You ever post a status on Facebook and then immediately regret it? It's like sending a risky text but to everyone you've ever met. And the worst part? Aunt Karen always has something to say about it.
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