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Ever wake up and realize you've been cuddling your pillow all night like it's your long-lost love? Pillow, my eternal companion, I swear I didn't cheat on you with that comfy blanket!
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You know you're an adult when the highlight of your day is not the party, not the adventure, but the mere anticipation of crawling into your own bed. It's the little things, like a mattress with no judgment.
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My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I was supposed to do. It's like a reverse memory foam mattress. It remembers everything I forgot.
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Sleep-deprived people are basically walking zombies. But have you ever noticed that no one is ever scared of a sleep-deprived zombie apocalypse? We're all just like, "Yeah, they probably need a nap.
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Sleeping positions are like relationship status updates for your body. "Today, I'm feeling the classic 'starfish,' tomorrow, who knows, maybe the 'pretzel'?" It's a daily adventure on the mattress safari.
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You ever notice how getting into bed with freshly washed sheets is like slipping into a cocoon of adulthood? It's like, "Ah, I'm an independent butterfly with matching pillowcases.
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Sleeping is the only time when your problems are truly on pause. It's like hitting the escape key on life. The only catch is that it lasts for only a third of your day.
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The snooze button on the alarm clock is like a time machine, but instead of traveling to the future, you just get ten more minutes of denial. "I can totally get ready in five minutes, right?
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I recently read that we spend about one-third of our lives sleeping. And yet, if you spend a third of your day at work, they call it dedication, but if you do it in bed, they call it laziness. Double standards, anyone?
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