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Captain's Log
The Captain's struggle with modern technology
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I told the crew to "walk the plank," and half of them thought I was introducing a new fitness trend. I just want them off the ship!
The Rookie Pirate
Navigating the pirate world as a newbie
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They handed me a treasure map and said, "X marks the spot." I dug and found an "X." Turned out, it was just the buried remains of a pirate who couldn't read maps. Talk about a wrong turn!
The Lookout
Trying to find excitement in the mundane
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They told me to "keep an eye out for trouble." I said, "Sure, but trouble these days is just pirates arguing about who gets the last slice of pizza.
Ship's Chef
Dealing with picky eaters on a pirate ship
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I told the crew we're having fish for dinner. One guy asked if it was sustainably sourced. I said, "Buddy, we're pirates, not Whole Foods!
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