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Joke Types
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What do you get when you cross a toy with a vegetable? A 'plushroom' at the toy drive!
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Why was the teddy bear a great addition to the toy drive committee? It had 'bear'y good organizational skills!
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I tried to donate a toy boat to the drive, but they said it would sink their plans!
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Why did the teddy bear refuse to join the toy drive? It was already stuffed!
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Why did the action figure break up with the doll before the toy drive? It needed space!
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I tried to donate a toy car to the drive, but they said it wasn't in 'drive'-able condition!
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Why did the rubber ducky go to the toy drive? It wanted to make a 'splash' in the community!
The Wrapping Chronicles
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You ever notice how gift-wrapping skills suddenly become a matter of pride during a toy drive? I'm over there struggling with the wrapping paper, creating a masterpiece that looks like it survived a tornado. Meanwhile, Martha Stewart's doppelgänger next to me is creating gift wrap origami. I'm just happy if the wrapping stays on until the kid gets home.
Regifting Repercussions
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You know, I accidentally donated a regift to the toy drive. I hope some kid out there enjoys their second-hand talking parrot that still occasionally squawks Happy Birthday at random times. It's the gift that keeps on giving, whether you want it to or not.
Toy Drive Gift Guilt
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I overheard two kids at the toy drive arguing over who got the better present. It was like witnessing a miniature version of Black Friday. One kid was boasting about his action figures, and the other was sulking with a board game. I thought, Come on, kids, it's not about the size of the toy; it's about the joy it brings. Also, can I borrow that board game?
Toy Drive Techno Trouble
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Have you ever tried assembling toys for a toy drive? It's like deciphering ancient hieroglyphics. I spent an entire day trying to put together a robot for some lucky kid. By the end, I was more confused than the robot itself. I'm pretty sure that robot is going to spend its days in a corner, muttering, Why do I have three arms? What is my purpose?
Toy Drive Wishlist Woes
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I asked a kid at the toy drive what he wanted for Christmas, thinking he'd say something like a teddy bear or a video game. Nope. He looked me dead in the eyes and said, A unicorn. I said, Kid, I can't even find a parking spot during the holidays, let alone a mythical creature with a horn on its head.
Toy Drive Traditions
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I realized that toy drives have their own set of traditions. Like the tradition of pretending you didn't just buy a toy you found in the back of your closet. Oh, this old thing? I totally bought it just for the toy drive, not because I forgot my nephew's birthday last year.
Santa's Naughty List
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You ever notice how Santa Claus is basically running the ultimate toy drive every year? He's got the whole operation down to a science. But if you think about it, he's essentially breaking into people's houses, leaving gifts, and eating their snacks. If I did that, I'd be on the FBI's Most Wanted list, not the Nice list.
The Ultimate Toy Drive Hack
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I figured out the ultimate hack for toy drives. Instead of spending hours shopping and wrapping, I just handed out gift cards. I call it the Christmas Cash Cab. Now kids get to experience the joy of shopping and parents get a break from pretending they love assembling bicycles at 2 AM. It's a win-win!
Toy Drive Drama
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You know, I recently got involved in a toy drive, trying to spread some holiday cheer. But let me tell you, organizing a toy drive is like herding cats. Everybody wants to help, but the moment you ask them to wrap a gift, they act like you've just assigned them a mission to Mars. I mean, come on, it's not rocket science, it's just a Barbie doll!
Generosity Gone Wrong
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I love the idea of a toy drive, but people get so competitive about it. It's like a game of one-upmanship. My neighbor donated a shiny new bike, so I felt the need to step up my game. I ended up donating a life-sized cutout of myself. Now some kid out there is waking up on Christmas morning, thinking, Who's this weird cardboard guy, and where's my bike?
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