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Joke Types
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What did the steak say to the chef? 'You really know how to meat my expectations!
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What do you call a cow that plays guitar? A moo-sician, just like a steak with a sizzling performance!
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How does a steak answer the phone? 'Grill-o? Is it me you're cooking for?
Steak and the Single Life
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Steakhouse dinners are great, but they're also a bit like dating. You're sitting there, hoping for the perfect cut, trying not to look too desperate. And if it's overcooked, you end up with something tough that you regret committing to.
Steakhouse and Social Media
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Ever notice how people at steakhouses can't resist taking a picture of their food before eating? It's like they're saying, Look at this perfectly seared piece of art that I'm about to devour and regret posting when I realize I forgot to take a pic of my date!
Vegetarian Vengeance
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I took my vegetarian friend to a steakhouse, thinking I could convert them. The waiter asked if they wanted a salad, and they said, No, just bring me the saddest plate of grilled vegetables you have. Mission failed.
Steakhouse Standoff
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You ever been to a steakhouse where they ask, How would you like your steak cooked? I'm like, On a grill, in a kitchen, by a professional chef... is this a trick question?
Grilling the Waiter
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I asked the waiter at the steakhouse, What's the difference between medium-rare and medium? He goes, About five minutes, but I can make it happen. I'm like, No, I was looking for a culinary explanation, not a magic trick!
The Steakhouse Dress Code
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Why is it that steakhouse waiters always dress like they're auditioning for a Broadway show about cowboys? I half-expect them to break into a musical number while serving my medium-rare masterpiece.
Steak Sauce Struggles
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Why do steakhouse menus always have a dozen different sauces? I feel like I'm on a first date, trying to impress my steak with the right flavor. I promise I'm not too spicy or too bland, just the perfect amount of zing!
The Steak Conspiracy
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I went to a fancy steakhouse the other day, and they had this big, intimidating steak menu. It's like they're trying to confuse us. Do you want the sirloin, ribeye, or filet mignon? I'm just thinking, I want the one that won't bankrupt me, please!
Steakhouse Etiquette
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At a steakhouse, they hand you a massive knife and expect you to cut your steak like a pro. I'm there sawing away, thinking, Am I at a dinner table or auditioning for a horror movie where the steak fights back?
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