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You know, I recently had to go to the doctor because I wasn't feeling too hot. And the first thing they did was prescribe me some medication. Now, have you ever read those pamphlets that come with prescription drugs? They're like novels! You need a degree just to understand the side effects. They'll be like, "This pill might cure your headache, but it could also give you the ability to speak fluent Swahili while sleepwalking!
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The warning labels on prescription drugs are like a horror story in tiny print. "May cause dizziness, drowsiness, increased appetite, decreased appetite, a sudden urge to learn the accordion, and the inexplicable ability to sneeze in Morse code." It's like they're saying, "Sure, take this pill, but be prepared for the adventure of a lifetime!
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Ever notice how prescription drug names sound like they were generated by a group of monkeys throwing darts at a dictionary? They're so complicated, I can barely pronounce them, let alone understand what they do! I bet these pharmaceutical companies have a team of poets just making up these names, like, "This drug shall be called 'Fluffernutterall,' because it sounds as whimsical as its $500 price tag!
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I'm convinced that pharmacies are playing a game of "Let's confuse the customers." You go in there, hand over your prescription, and they're like, "Okay, your doctor prescribed this." Then they give you a medication that could be a pill or a suppository, but they won't tell you which until you get home! It's like pharmaceutical roulette.
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