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I find it amusing how the disclaimers for some prescription drugs are longer than the actual advice your doctor gives you. "Take one pill daily... but first, let's delve into the potential hazards of becoming a one-man band.
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It's wild how prescription drugs have names that sound like they were generated by a random word generator on overdrive. "Ask your doctor about Bluoxymagicon! Warning: you may start levitating.
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Have you ever listened to the speed at which they announce the side effects of prescription drugs in commercials? It's like they're competing in the "Fastest Disclaimer Recitation" event. Blink and you've missed the part about spontaneous breakdancing.
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Ever read the pamphlets that come with prescription drugs? They should come with a complementary highlighter and a quiz at the end. "Congratulations! You've completed Side Effect Bingo. Your prize? A newfound fear of pickles.
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You know what's bizarre? Those prescription drug commercials where they spend 10 seconds listing side effects in a calm voice. It's like, "This pill may cure your sneezing but might also turn you into a part-time unicorn.
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The names they give prescription drugs are like attempts to make you forget how much they cost. "Oh, this pill is called GoldenCure, it must be worth its weight in gold, right? Literally.
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You ever notice how prescription drugs have names that sound like rejected roller coaster names? "Have you tried Zyrtec? It's like a loop-de-loop for your sinuses!
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You ever see those commercials where they spend 20 seconds talking about how a pill will solve your problem, then 40 seconds listing side effects? It's like a bad Tinder date: promising at first, then you find out they're allergic to air.
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Ever notice how the packaging for prescription drugs is like a game of "How Many Warning Labels Can We Fit on This Tiny Paper?" They should just hand out magnifying glasses with each bottle.
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