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Why did the neckbeard start a band? He wanted to play some byte-sized music!
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What did the neckbeard say to his computer? 'You complete me, Ctrl+C and Ctrl+V!
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Why did the neckbeard apply for a job at the bakery? He heard they kneaded him!
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Why did the neckbeard become a chef? He wanted to master the art of the neckbeard marinara!
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Why did the neckbeard become a gardener? He wanted to cultivate his beard of knowledge!
If neckbeards put half the effort into grooming that they do into defending their favorite anime, we'd have a whole new breed of stylish lumberjacks!
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I admire their dedication, I really do. But it's like they've chosen their battles: perfecting the ultimate 'waifu' argument over personal hygiene. I mean, priorities, right? Imagine if they applied that passion to something like, I don't know, showering regularly? We'd have a grooming revolution on our hands!
Neckbeards and I have something in common: we both avoid razor blades like they're the plague!
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Hey, you ever noticed those guys with neckbeards? It's like they're trying to cultivate a garden of solitude right under their chins. I mean, I get it. Shaving's a chore. But these guys take it to a whole new level! They've turned laziness into an art form. I bet when they go to the barber, the barber charges them for landscaping services!
Neckbeards: the only demographic that can make 'scratch and sniff' fashionable again!
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Ever been close to a neckbeard? It's like playing a game of 'guess the smell'. They're a walking potpourri of Doritos, Mountain Dew, and a hint of existential regret. I'm convinced their beard serves as an air freshener for their constant bad decisions.
I once saw a neckbeard so thick, I mistook it for a small mammal. Dude probably needed a wildlife preservation permit just to walk around!
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Seriously, these neckbeards are something else. I saw this one guy whose beard was so voluminous, it had its own gravitational pull. You could've hidden snacks in there for later, like a squirrel stashing acorns for winter. I wouldn't be surprised if birds mistook it for a cozy nest!
Neckbeards must be the envy of every barber's worst nightmare - the only clients who think 'unlimited neck hair' is an achievement!
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I bet barbers see them coming and wonder if they should charge by the inch. These guys take 'I'll have a little off the top' to a whole new level. They probably have a 10-step beard care routine, but the neck? Nah, that's the wild west of their facial landscape!
Neckbeards: proof that some people misunderstood the term 'necklace' and took it way too literally!
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I mean, kudos to their commitment. But I'm pretty sure that's not what jewelry designers had in mind when they crafted the concept of a 'neck adornment'. I wouldn't be shocked if they started weaving friendship bracelets in there to complete the look.
I'm convinced that neckbeards are just trying to bring back the 'neck rug' trend. It's like they're part-time hipsters, full-time oblivious!
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It's 2023, and yet there are these guys still rocking neckbeards like they're auditioning for a Victorian-era period drama. I wouldn't be shocked if they started a petition to make neckbeards an official fashion statement. And you know what? It might just work - until they realize they're only popular among dust mites and lint.
You know, if neckbeards were currency, some of these guys could single-handedly fund a small country!
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I mean, think about it. You've got enough neckbeard to rival the GDP of some nations. They could be walking around with a fortune right under their chin! Someone should tell them to shave it off and start a beard bank - they'd be the richest folks on the block!
You know you've met a true neckbeard when their neck's more densely populated than a rush hour subway train!
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These neckbeards must have some kind of secret pact to never let a single inch of their neck see the light of day. I bet they've got an underground community living in there - probably a miniaturized society with its own government and laws!
Neckbeards are the real-life embodiment of 'neck and neck' competition - between their beard and their inability to impress anyone!
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Have you ever seen a neckbeard try to impress someone? It's like watching a penguin try to fly. They'll go on and on about their vast knowledge of obscure video games and recite Monty Python sketches like it's Shakespeare. But hey, at least they're consistent - consistently failing to win anyone's heart!
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