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Why did the Christmas tree go to the nativity play? It wanted to be a little tree-mendous!
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What do you call the shepherds who always bring their guitars to the nativity? The strum-ming trio!
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What's the favorite Christmas carol of the nativity animals? 'Fleece Navidad'!
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Why did the wise men bring frankincense to the nativity scene? Because they wanted it to smell divine!
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What did the sheep say to the shepherd during the nativity? 'Stop telling ewe what to do!
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I always wondered if the wise men brought practical gifts. Like, did one of them think, 'Gold is nice, but have you considered a diaper bag? I heard parenting can get messy.'
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I love the nativity story, but let's be real – if it happened today, the three wise men would be following Google Maps, and Mary and Joseph would be posting about the miracle birth on Instagram with #Blessed.
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You know it's a rough nativity scene when the donkey's giving side-eye to the sheep like, 'You're in my spot, baa-ck off!'
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You know you're getting old when you attend a nativity play and think, 'I remember when Joseph had hair and the three wise men needed GPS.'
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The Nativity Scene - where everyone's pretending it's all calm and serene, but in reality, Mary's giving Joseph the side-eye like, 'You better not mess up this birth story in front of the shepherds.'
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If the nativity scene was a modern sitcom, it would be called 'Miracle at Bethlehem,' and each episode would end with the angel saying, 'Tune in next week for more divine drama!'
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The nativity scene is like the original baby photoshoot. I can imagine Mary saying, 'Hold on, let me get this right – angels, wise men, and a donkey, and Jesus, can you at least try to look cute for the camera?'
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The nativity story is the ultimate in unconventional birth plans. 'Okay, so we'll have the baby in a stable, surrounded by farm animals – because nothing says 'Welcome to the world' like the smell of hay and a cow mooing.'
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I bet if the nativity happened today, Mary would be on a reality show called 'Teen Virgin Mom.' And Joseph would be the confused boyfriend, saying, 'I swear, I don't know how it happened, it's a miracle!'
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